This morning I woke up feeling better, more refreshed than I had in a while.
The past days I had played ball with my fear and anxiety, bouncing it back and fourth without being able to just throw it away once and for all.
Easier said than done.
I had probably tested my dear husband’s patience a lot as well.
What he was thinking, I could only guess. He had told me a little and I noticed his slight change in behaviour; locking himself into the study more often than he had in years. Thankfully this time without the company of Ogden..
The questions ‘Who’ and ‘Why’ was obviously troubling him as much as me.
But not a word had come from him about me having to pull myself together or telling me to stop it.
The supportive and caring Lucius was what I had seen the past days.
It made me love him even more.
He is as many-layered as an onion.. There are times I wish other people could see it, in order to understand my love for this man.
I felt privileged, loved and quite sure we would land on our feet once again. We endure, that’s what we do, what we have always done.
Whoever was out there, wanting to destroy our now so perfect and quiet, not to mention comfortable life: they wouldn’t give up. My intuition told me so, and I have learned to trust it.
Together we are strong, standing alone in a corner overwhelmed by fear, anxiety and a tad bit of selfishness we would be easy targets.
By impersonating my husband and son, these unknown people had tried the oldest trick in the book; divide and conquer. I could easily have mistrusted Lucius.. when I saw the still picture from the muggle newspaper. I could have thought he kept secrets from me..again, like he used to do during the war(s).
I chose to believe him, not because it made me feel better; because I could see it in his eyes he was telling me the truth.
Draco I had not heard from, and that alone could make a mother go insane, especially in a situation like this.
I had to tell myself many times he was fine. My little dragon was safe and sound still on holiday somewhere.
It still bothered me, that someone, maybe even someone we knew would do a thing like this. I hope we one day will solve it, that we will know who did it and why.
Trust no one.
Tagged as: Narcissa. Narcissa Malfoy's diary. today. The Present. twitter-rp. 8 Years Later.